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xxnightmare13

will eat your heart! X3
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Gone for Long

2 min read
    So I've pretty much been gone for a long time. Not a lot has changed. I'm still the same pathetic loser but now with a boyfriend and more enemies. My "enemies" do make me depressed and pathetic every now and then but my boyfriend always ends up making me feel better.
    Music has been helping me a lot and it is one of my many loves. One of the things that I'm pretty happy about is that this summer, I will be going to Warped Tour 2014!! FUCK YEAH!! There aren't many bands that I want to see though. Here's a list of bands that I'm looking forward to seeing -
-I Fight Dragons
-Falling In Reverse
-Get Scared
-We Are The In Crowd
-Attila
- Motionless in White
-Bowling For Soup

Next month, I will also be going to my first concert. I had actually gone to a Plain White T's concert over the summer but it shouldn't even be considered a concert since it sucked ass. It only lasted like 25 minutes. The concert I will be going to will be in my town. It will actually be like a 5 minute walk from my house. Literally. The bands I'm going to be seeing are I See Stars, Like Moths to Flames, Miss Fortune, GHOST TOWN, and Razihel. I'm really hoping it's going to be awesome and I would like to get into a mosh pit but my boyfriend says no. Oh well. We'll see what happens.
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One of my friends has his own YouTube channel and it looked like fun so I decided to try having my own. My first video was already uploaded and it would be great if you guys support me in starting it up. The first video was pretty much a Q&A video. I was asked questions and I answered them. My next video is just going to be a video game playthrough or walkthrough. It would mean so much if you guys can support me!

Here's the link to my channel. >>> www.youtube.com/user/heartsnot…
Here's the link to my first video. >>> www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5p3fg…
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My closest friends know that I have suffered from suicidal thoughts, bullying, and self-harm. I have other friends that are dealing with the same thing and even suicide attempts. My best guy friend, Taytay actually made a video talking about his depression and how he dealt with it. It is a video I highly recommend watching. Here is the www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1UAAZ… to the video
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Spirit Day this year was October 17 and I went to school all in purple. About two days before, a best friend of mine and I created our own videos detailing how we were bullied and how we wanted to commit suicide. The links are down below.

Taylor's >>> www.youtube.com/watch?v=AR9Fui…
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This past week was suicide awareness week and that was the topic we discussed in my Cosmetology class. A friend of mine talked about his suicide attempt. He talked about he nearly died and about how much he struggled. After he finished talking, I talked about how I wanted to kill myself in my freshman year. The thing I didn't expect to happen was that I would breakdown in tears. I could barely talk and others were crying. Many people hugged me throughout the day telling me everything was going to be okay. My instructor even had me go talk to a school counselor. Her advice was to keep a journal so I can express myself and not go towards self-harm. Now I have a journal of which I'm decorating to also show my creativity. The friends that do know me now, the journal is covered in band pictures :I
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